faemused | Open To Anyone For Anything RP Post 2

"But... but that's impossible!" Caranthir stammers. "I... I have had no other... feelings... for any. And you have no sister in any case."

"You have misunderstood." She meets his gaze without faltering. "She is our daughter, Caranthir. Yours and mine."

"Ours?!?" Is about all he can manage.

"Yes. I have no doubt of it."

He drops his head into his hands and shakes his head, taking a few deep breaths before he lifts his head and looks at Haleth again.

"What... what did our daughter..." And Eru but that's so strange to say. "What did she want of us?"

He is taking this more calmly than Haleth had expected, in truth. She shrugs. "Nothing. She does not know why she was brought, not how, nor for what purpose. So far she has been content to remain with the Haladin, spending time with...with the mother she had lost."

Her eyes lower for a moment. It is not knowledge of her own eventual death that troubles Haleth, but speaking of it to Caranthir. She pokes at the fire, unnecessarily. "There is no way to return to her own time that she knows of, save for the long road. She is inclined to view this impossibility as a blessing of sorts." Her eyes flicker back to him. "She does wish to meet with you, if you are willing."

He is taking this calmly because the alternative is to run away screaming.

He flinches a little at the reminder that Haleth is mortal. He has more sympathy for Aegnor, these days, not that he would ever say that to his cousin - besides, Aegnor didn't even try.

"I...." He says helplessly and then nods. "I ... I would like that. But. The reasons you gave... still hold. For me."

The Oath, the Doom.

Haleth, in contrast, has always been calm about Canien's appearance and existence. Impossible or not, it is a fact; she had only to decide what to do about it. And that, in the end, was not difficult.

Much more difficult to decide how Canien's existence changes her relationship--or lack of it--with Caranthir. If it does.

"They do," Haleth agrees, her voice quiet. "But Canien escaped those fates. That much she has told me." She closes her eyes briefly. "There are many things about her life I have refused knowledge of, for they are not mine to know. But that, I did ask. The Doom of the Valar perhaps weighs on her as it does on all the Firstborn, but the Oath at least did not ensnare her."

Haleth is nearly unflappable; her temper is hard to rouse outside of battle, and she can face tempests without upset. But there is relief underlying her words, and to one who knows her there will be something else obvious: she loves this impossible daughter. There are very few whom Haleth loves, by any measure, but Canien is among them.

He sags, visibly relieved.

"That is good." He breathes, throwing a hand over his eyes. "That is very, very good."

Of all the arguments Haleth gave, that one was the cruelest, for it was the truest, as well, that Oath and Doom followed hard at his heels, and to bind to him would be to bring It's attention to those he most loved, and it was that argument that has kept him away.

The way he sags tugs at her heart, and she feels the pangs of guilt. "The cruelest thing I did was to use your fear of the Void against you," Haleth says, her voice even more quiet than it was. "I am sorry. I should not have done it."

"It was only cruel because it is true." He says and scrubs at his eyes before letting the arm fall.

"It is still true, Haleth."

Haleth forces herself to meet his gaze, even though his reddened eyes make her ache. "That you fear the Void--or that you fear I and mine would be pulled to it, by your Oath?"

"Both." He admits hoarsely.

"Haleth, the noose grows ever tighter, I can see it in my brothers, and doubtless they can see it in me. Sooner or later, we are going to lose."

Haleth looks pained; she likes the fact of his Doom as little as he likes the fact of her mortality. "But if Canien speaks truly, she escapes that fate, when the time for it closes around you," she says finally. "As do I and all the other Haladin."

They have been sitting several feet apart, but now Haleth stands and moves closer, kneels on her haunches next to him. Slowly, giving him plenty of time to rebuff her if he chooses, she reaches for his hand, the one he used to cover his eyes. "I do not know if you ever realized that when I drove you away, there was one argument I did not make."

The one that above all others would have ended the matter: she has never said she does not love him. It would have been by far the easiest way, and it would have been a lie.

"That is a blessing unlooked for." He says quietly, and looks back at her, allowing her to take his hand.

"Was there?" He says quietly, still angry enough to want her to say it.

Haleth exhales a short, sharp breath. Her eyes drop, and a rueful smile flits across her face. She deserved that rebuke. She knows it. She kneels there looking at their joined hands for a moment longer. She should not have spoken this far--she had not intended to--but his obvious fear and grief of his future could not be ignored.

"I do love you," she says finally. "I always did. I do not know if that will bring you any comfort, after all this time."

He sucks in a sharp breath, and the hand in hers trembles.

"It does." He says hoarsely.

She does not look up at his face. That measure of privacy, at least, he has. And besides, she hardly needs to; she can feel how his fingers tremble in hers. "Good." It is barely a whisper.

There is another pause before, with a sigh, she releases his hand and stands, walking back to her previous seat. "Canien intends to ride to see you whether you wished it or no, in truth," she says, and her voice is almost steady. Almost. "But agreed to let me meet with you first and give warning." She looks at him very briefly, and back again almost at once. "It is a strange thing to meet with one who knows you so well while you know them not at all. But I have found much in Canien to make me proud, and think you will also."

He makes a sound as she pulls away, almost of pain, fingers reaching for her before he stops himself.

"............Are you sure it is safe?"

She looks faintly conflicted at that sound, and her hand closes in on itself. "I am sure she will do it whether it is safe or no, for she has all your stubborness and mine both," she says. "But I also think I have rarely met anyone so well able to care for herself. You need not fear for her safety."

He manages a smile, at that.

"I would expect no less, for any child born of you and I."

But it hurts, to think of what might have been, what they might have had, even if only for a season.

His smile is pained and tremulous. Haleth looks more conflicted yet. "I may have erred, in coming here," she says, meeting his eyes. "It was not my intention to wound you further."

"No!" He shakes his head.

"I... I needed to know this. To know, that somehow, some light remains. I will go easier to my own doom, this way."

Haleth does not look convinced, and her eyes are grave. She hesitates again, about to say something, then stops.

"Meet with our daughter," she says after a moment. "I think you will find much that shines, within her."

He runs a hand down his face and sighs again before nodding, trying to pull himself together again.

"If you think it safe, I will. Is she here?"

keywords XD

hehee

he's like: what no this is not logical

He's not wrong!

XD

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yes I'm prioritizing this one above all other threads so what

XD XD XD

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