faemused | Open To Anyone For Anything RP Post 2

[There's a lot of Ella Fitzgerald on there. One of Steve's happiest discoveries about the future was discovering she lived a good long life making music, and eventually covered most of the songs of Cole Porter. All of which are on that little machine, along with the other great crooners, swing music, big band, jazz...whatever he could remember or find.

Whatever he thought might make Bucky smile.]

Be really old fashioned and go in person. Assuming your goats won't miss you too much.

[Bucky's a fan of Ella Fitzgerald, maybe more so now than he had been all those years ago. When it comes to music, it doesn't take much to make him happy. He likes a little of everything. Shuri's introduced him to some interesting artists he'd never heard of, even when he was free from HYDRA and on the run. And when a few of those pop up on randomized play, he'll be more amused than he should be. He gets a kick out of the young woman. She reminds him a bit of Becca.

He narrows his eyes at the mention of the animals, though.]

Don't drag the goats into this, Pal. [It's said with plenty of humor and he cocks his head to the side, considering for a moment, then rising to his feet, holding out his hand.]

[Steve raises his eyebrow a little at the outstretched hand. It's obvious what Bucky's offering--asking. And it wouldn't even be the first time. It was Bucky who gave Steve his first awkward attempts at dance lessons, decades ago when they were both boys. Bucky had been infinitely patient with Steve's frustrated, awkward attempts to mimic the graceful motions, remember which foot went where at what point, and the way he'd often just end up breathless and annoyed and convinced no girl anywhere would ever want to dance with him.

Bucky has always had more belief in Steve than Steve has in himself, in certain areas.]

I did try to bring along a dance hall and a lot of pretty redheads, but they wouldn't fit in the box.

[Steve reaches out and takes the hand, lets Bucky pull him up out of the chair. The easy, flippant language covers up the way his heart is beating faster all at once, which he's trying not to think about.]

You realize I never did learn how to dance, right? I'm likely to step on your feet. And I weigh a lot more than I used to.

[He doesn't dismiss the notion even at Steve's arched eyebrow, waiting patiently because he knows the other man will relent eventually. It was practically illegal to refuse to dance to Ella Fitzgerald, after all. And if not illegal, some kind of cardinal sin. He laughs softly at the flippant remark, though.]

Yeah, well, you brought me a tall blonde instead, so I guess I'll just have to make do.

[And maybe, maybe those words are too close to revealing things he's kept under wraps since they were teens, but he thinks his tone is playful enough that Steve won't think twice about it. He smiles as Steve slides his hand into his own and he helps him up.]

I haven't danced in over seventy years. I might be the one stepping on your feet.

[That quip earns a small huff of a laugh. Steve puts his other hand at Bucky's waist, and there's no hesitation to the gesture. There's no hesitation anywhere. If anything, Steve's eyes look soft. Happy.]

Go right ahead. Pretty sure my feet can take it.

[He's almost surprised by Steve's lack of hesitation, remembering clearly how uncertain and wary he'd been all those decades ago when Bucky'd tried to teach him to dance. Then again, he supposes that a hell of a lot's changed between then and now. It's the expression on his face that has Bucky almost stumbling over his feet. He's not sure he's ever seen Steve look quite so content before and he's not sure what to make of it.

They fall into step together, mostly just swaying to the music.]

I'm really glad you're here, Steve. [His voice is quiet. He's missed him more than he knows how to say.]

[A lot has changed since the last time they danced, and Steve's greater height and Bucky's missing arm aren't the greatest changes.

For one thing, there's no self-consciousness in Steve now, as they do a first few steps. The track changes but it's still Ella singing, low and slow, and they settle into the rhythm.]

Nowhere else I'd rather be.

[Just as quiet. Just as true. Steve doesn't really know how to stop, and there's always work that needs doing, but this...this is where he's happy. More than happy now, with Bucky's hand in his and his arm around Bucky's waist.

It really doesn't take long for their dance hold to become more an embrace than anything else.]

[Steve's height had taken him weeks to get used to back in the war. All their lives until then, Bucky had been the taller of the two and he'd been used to it. Suddenly having to look up at Steve to meet his eyes had been - a lot. It's all water under the bridge now, though. He no longer found himself bothered by the change.

And the fact that Steve's lost that awkward self-consciousness that he used to carry around like unwanted baggage -- that's a bonus. A big bonus. It's like Steve finally sees the same things in himself -- at least sometimes -- that Bucky had always seen, growing up side by side.

He smiles, eyes crinkling at the quiet words as he hesitates a second and then shifts closer, letting his eyes close as he lets his hand drop from Steve's and winds his arm around his waist instead, letting out the breath he hadn't even realized he'd been holding.]

I've been thinking. About -- how you can't go home. [To Brooklyn, he means.]

[Steve's height took a long time for him to get used to. A lifetime of being loomed over, suddenly ended and replaced with him looking above heads. And it'd been strangest of all with Bucky, after having it be the default to look up to him, in more ways than just the literal.

It's a while since he's been so aware that the size he is now isn't how it always was, but he's not about to complain. Not when Bucky is able to wrap his arm around Steve's waist and pull in closer. Not when Steve can--carefully, able to stop or move if the other man shows any signs of hesitating or discomfort--rest his head against Bucky's. Their hold is definitely an embrace now, for all that they're still slow dancing, swaying gently to Ella's croon.]

I could probably find a way, if I really wanted.

[And it's tempting, sometimes. Steve loves Brooklyn, loves New York, and won't deny he misses it. But at the same time, he's a different person now, someone who's fighting for the whole world. Not just his old neighborhood, not just America.

And more importantly...he turns his head a little. It's not a kiss on the top of Bucky's head, not even really a nuzzle, but the movement hints at both.]

But I mean it. Nowhere else I'd rather be than right here.

[Not Wakanda, but with Bucky, wherever Bucky is. Especially if that means here, with their arms around each other, practically able to hear each other's heartbeats. It feels more like home than anywhere he's been in longer than he can remember.]

[There are no signs of hesitation or discomfort on Bucky's part. They'd always been somewhat tactile with each other, before war and ice and HYDRA had torn them apart for over seven decades. His best, happiest memories are of orbiting around Steve like he'd been the sun, because for Bucky, that's what he was. What he still is. It feels, in a lot of ways, that this level of closeness has always been inevitable. Like they've been hurtling toward it their entire lives.

He nods slightly in acknowledgment. Steve probably could make it back to Brooklyn. Most of the world still loved Captain America, and he can't help but think Tony Stark would let him return without too much of a fuss. His heart skips at the slight, affectionate movement from Steve, and he shifts half an inch closer to him without really thinking about it.]

Good. Because -- I was thinking about that too. Being on the move all the time...it's rough. [And Bucky would know, because he'd been on the run for two years before Steve found him in Bucharest. And maybe he hadn't been fighting like Steve has, but the constant looking over your shoulder, the fear that you'd be found and dragged somewhere else that you didn't want to be...that had been exhausting.]

So uh, I was thinking of adding onto this place. Making it bigger. Room for two. [He chews his lower lip.] You know, for when you're between missions. [A home to come back to.] If that's - something you think you might want.

[It's been so easy to take these small, significant steps that Steve is wondering how it hasn't happened sooner. Intellectually, he knows why--he's always busy, and more importantly Bucky's needed time to recover from a wide assortment of traumas. Or start recovering, at least; some things you don't get over, you just get past or through them. They both needed time to get used too...everything.

That's the thing about healing, though, and also about life. A lot of it happens subtly when you're not paying attention, and then time's gone by and things are different.

Steve and Bucky have always been tactile, quick to hug or clasp hands or shoulders, physically easy with each other. This is different. Steve, at least, knows it and knows why. Every time Bucky moves closer, Steve is there to welcome him and pull him in.]

I'd like that a lot.

[He would, too. He's had homes in the past few years, an apartment, his space in the Avengers Complex, but they were mostly places to leave things and to sleep in. This would actually be a home. One they made together, and that's the most appealing part of all.

Steve chuckles a little, the huff of breath moving Bucky's hair away from his scalp.]

If you think your landlord won't object. And I mean the goat, not T'challa.

[It's far easier that he ever really imagined it could be. He wonders if it might have been this easy back before the war if he'd just had the courage. If he hadn't been so damned scared. But times had been so different then, and while they'd always been good about sticking together and keeping to themselves, that was a line Bucky hadn't dared allow himself to cross. Not with Steve. Because it might have meant getting the other man hurt, or thrown in jail or even worse and he never would have forgiven himself.

The fact that Steve isn't discouraging the closeness makes his heart beat more quickly in his chest and when he agrees that he'd like to make this place his home between missions, Bucky smiles, eyes brighter than they have been in awhile.]

Excuse you. I'm their landlord not the other way around. And as long as you feed them treats, they'll be fine.

[Things were different before the war. Steve'd had too much to prove, whether he ever admitted it or not, and there was a lot he didn't know or just plain hadn't thought about. And if Bucky had been too damned scared, Steve had been too damned angry, and too busy fighting all the world to stop and think.

But he's older now. They both are.]

Do they know that?

[He pulls back to look at Buck's face as he says it, laughing at him from just a few inches away. Less.

And then the laughter fades from his face and Steve swallows, because Bucky is right there. That face is as familiar as anything Steve knows in the world and more loved than he'd ever be able to put in words, not if he lives for ten times a hundred years.

He doesn't even mean to do it. He's thought of it a thousand times, more, wondered if a good time would ever come around and told himself over and over that it doesn't matter, that the only thing that matters is that Bucky is alive, safe, sane. And it's true, that's most of what Steve needs, just to know that fixed point in his world is out there.

It's not all he wants, though, which is how he ends up crossing those few inches of distance and brushing his mouth over Bucky's, and it's soft and it's light and it's happening before he even realizes he's doing it.]

You're a punk.

[He huffs out a laugh, clear amusement on his face. He'd never in a million years thought he'd end up living in Wakanda tending to a herd of goats but here he is. He knows Steve gets a kick out of teasing him about it, and frankly he gets a kick out of Steve's amusement over it.

But then Steve grows serious and it registers just how close they're standing, face to face and a million and one emotions threaten to overwhelm him. It's far from the first time he's thought about this very thing. He's been thinking about it since they were still two punk kids running the streets of Brooklyn, even if he'd done his best to tuck away that desire, those thoughts that plagued him for years.

The feel of Steve's lips against his own sends an electric shock through him and he lifts his hand to the back of the other man's neck, anchoring him in place.]

[Steve is incredibly aware of every slight movement either of them makes, how their lips catch at each other, the way Bucky leans into him. The hand he had on Bucky's waist has somehow just slid around to enclose him, and the one that was on his shoulder likewise, and then Bucky's hand is on the back of his neck and any thought of stopping or breaking off is ended before it's formed.

One brush of their mouths, then another, another, each slow and deliberate. They aren't even pretending to dance now, just standing entwined, Bucky's leg forward a little between Steve's, their chests expanding against each other every time either breathes in. Another. Another.

--and then the music changes to some godforsaken thing Steve's never heard the likes of, and he has to break off and give the device still on the table an incredulous, annoyed look, as if it's ruined the moment on purpose. Which for all he knows, it might have. It'd be just like Shuri.

And then the hilarity of it all catches up to him and he bursts out laughing, looks at Bucky, laughs some more, still clinging to the other man and laughing until he almost can't breathe.]

[By the time the music changes abruptly -- to something loud and very jarring, Bucky's breathless and a little dazed from the fact that he and Steve just kissed -- and not just something quick and chaste -- but with the promise of something more that's still undefined and he swallows hard.

There's no doubt that Shuri picked this song out and he grimaces momentarily until he can't help but laugh at how hard Steve is laughing.]

Okay, this is -- definitely not Ella Fitzgerald.

[He chuckles and reluctantly lets his hand drop from Steve's neck before moving to change the music to something less -- loud.]

[Steve would reply to agree, but he's still breathless from laughing. It's partly relief, he knows, a reaction to the fact that he's just kissed Bucky, and more importantly Bucky kissed him back. And the world hasn't ended, no one's burst in with guns blazing, Bucky hasn't stepped back and said no, he can't do this, for whatever reason (and whatever the reason Steve would have respected it, but God he's relieved that's not what's happened)...

All the things that might have gone wrong, all the various disasters that have happened to them both...yeah, a little hideous noise pretending to be music is welcome compared to the other possibilities, and he has to laugh at that.]

You sure? A lot of things have changed--

[But he can't even finish, can't even joke that the divine Ella Fitzgerald's style has changed that much, because he just sets himself off again. He follows Bucky to the table and leans on it, looking down at the gizmo that's set this off. Bucky has better luck when he changes the track, which goes back to something more from their time. Instrumental, lots of trumpets, proper big band stuff. Definitely meant for dancing to. Steve turns his head and grins at Buck, holding out a hand.]

Shall we try again?

[At dancing, the hand suggests. At kissing, he hopes. At anything, really. Everything.]

[It's probably the best day that Bucky's had in a long time. Having Steve here always makes him feel better, lighter, like maybe things will turn out okay eventually. Having him agree that that this could be his home, too, though, means more to him than just about anything. Brooklyn hasn't been his home for decades even if he misses it sometimes and probably always will. But he thinks Wakanda will be a nice, quiet place for them to figure out whatever it is that they're embarking on.

And building a bigger place to live will give Bucky plenty of things to do when Steve's away on missions.]

Not that much has changed.

[His words are heavy with double meaning despite the smile on his face, soft and full of warmth, something that not many have been privy to seeing from him. He holds Steve's gaze and reaches out, sliding his hand into the other man's easily.]

Which part do you want to try again? Just so we're clear.

[There might be a hint of teasing in his voice.]

All of it?

[Part hopeful, part amused, entirely giddy with laughter and a strange, comfortable excitement. Their hands fit together effortlessly, and Steve doesn't hesitate to step forward again and put his other hand back on Bucky's waist, bringing himself closer to that smile.]

Except for the being interrupted by someone trying to gargle rocks. I'll pass on that part.

[Bucky grins at his response, stepping closer to Steve, as well, and this time winding his arm around his shoulder and letting his hand rest there on the back of his neck, fingers gently curling into soft, fine hair at the base of his skull.]

I don't know. I feel like if we listened to it enough, we could get used to it.

[He's trying very hard now not to smirk, because, no. He's pretty sure they couldn't. He searches Steve's eyes, the same familiar blue that he's found himself getting lost in so many times over the years.]

What uh -- what brought this on? [The words are curious. He wonders if this is something Steve's spent time thinking about over the years or if it's something that just crept up on him recently.]

[Steve only lets go out of Bucky's hand out of the hope that it'll return to where it was before, and he smiles when it does, shivering a little at the curve of fingers at the top of his spine. His arms both go around Bucky's waist this time, like they're slow dancing again, even though the music is something much too upbeat for slow dancing. It doesn't matter at all. At the question, Steve just shrugs.]

I'd been wondering for a long time whether or not to say anything, and then you asked me to dance. Just kinda happened, after that. I wasn't planning it or anything--but I'm not sorry.

[Not at all sorry, given the snug grip he's got on Bucky now, or the way he's smiling.]

This a surprise for you, or something you knew about?

[Which part he means is open to interpretation.]

[It's not slow dancing music at all -- it's something that once upon a time he would have cut a serious rug to -- but he's far more focused on Steve than he is the music, so he doesn't really notice. He searches the other man's eyes, and considers his words, that he'd been wondering whether to say anything but hadn't really planned on it.]

You know you can always tell me anything. [Even if the feelings hadn't been reciprocated, Bucky wouldn't have judged him or made fun of him for them. And, realizing the irony of those words, he pauses, a faint chuckle escaping him.]

Yes, and no, I guess. I guess it's a surprise because I didn't realize that you thought about it. But I've known for awhile, how I felt.

[The music is a nice background, something familiar that doesn't jar. It's not where his attention is.]

I wasn't keeping it secret, just...been a lot more concerned with you getting in better shape first. That mattered more. Most.

[Shuri fixing his head, making sure he's had a good bit of time to re-ground himself now that he's loose from Hydra...all that.]

How long've you known, then? That you feel...however it is you feel.

[He huffs a laugh, because it's a little silly how they're tiptoeing around this. But he kinda likes it that way. Taking time to talk about it, but while vaguely slow dancing so it's already clear they're both on the same page even if they haven't said what the page is yet.]

[His expression softens at that and he looks down for a moment, holding his breath.]

Thank you. [His voice is quiet. He's still not 100%, and he's accepted the fact that there's a good chance he never will be. But he's better than he was, by miles. He's pretty sure that he owes his life to Steve and Shuri both.

His lips tip upwards, hint of amusement in his eyes, because he kind of likes this, too.]

Awhile. [He hesitates, shrugs a little.] Before the war.

[It doesn't have to be said that Bucky will never be 100%. They're both soldiers. They've seen the results of shellshock, ptsd, torture, lost limbs...all of it. And what Bucky went through was even worse than the normal horrors. Back to normal has never been the goal, not for Steve. Just making the new normal as good for Bucky as it can be. Which just now looks pretty good.]

That long?

[Yeah, that surprises him. They weren't much more than kids before the war.]

You know that you can tell me anything thing works both ways, right?

[It's teasing more than chiding, given his expression and the way he lifts a hand to splay on Bucky's back.]

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I am an Ella Fitzgerald devotee so this is making me super delighted. <3

Ella Fitzgerald is incredible and I love her too <3

\o/ Also Cole Porter. Combine the two and I'm a happy girl. also short phone tag whoo.

\o/

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