Crowley should have realized it would all go wrong when he tried to do something nice. That was definitely his mistake. Never do nice things. He might not work for Hell anymore but he's still a demon and therefor a fount of wickedness, mischief, sin, and vice in general, and therefore has no business doing nice things.
Except, it'd been for Aziraphale.
It isn't even that he likes doing nice things for Aziraphale. He doesn't. [1]Oh, the angel deserves nice things, Crowley won't deny that. All things great and small and cute and cuddly and beautiful and wonderful and okay, fine, so maybe, just maybe he's done Aziraphale a few kindnesses in their time. Maybe.
But for selfish reasons, ultimately. Because he is [2] addicted to the smile Aziraphale wears whenever Crowley does something nice for him. Crowley likes that smile. So it's purely selfish and not for the angel's benefit at all. Crowley is the one who benefits. He's justified it to himself like that for centuries--millennia now, really--and the logic is as sound as ever.
It's also now completely moot.
Several months ago, the world failed to end. Several weeks after that, Crowley and Aziraphale managed to actually get their act together (at the same speed, on their own side) and start something that might, just might, possibly, be considered a relationship. With kissing and everything.
And Crowley's never been happier, and judging by how often Aziraphale wears the smile Crowley used to go to great lengths to try and coax out of him, neither has Aziraphale.
So Crowley thought he'd do something...nice. The sort of thing humans in relationships do. A date. Dinner, flowers, an evening out.
Which is how he's ended up sitting at a performance of An Ideal Husband next to Aziraphale, watching actos and actresses exchange Oscar Wilde witticisms in the name of art and theatre.
It does not explain why he's got his arms folded over his chest and has been gradually looking more and more scowl-y as the play's gone on. Granted, one of the main themes is forgiveness for past mistakes, which is always going to be something as a sore point.
This was a bad idea and it's biting him and he's trying to hold his tongue and just enjoy the play, or at least enjoy Aziraphale enjoying the play, which was always going to be the real point of the evening for Crowley. But it's proving hard going.
And that's why Crowley shouldn't be caught doing nice things. Obviously. It only leads to trouble.
...fucking Oscar Wilde.
[1] As a professional fount of wickedness Crowley spends a lot of time lying, especially to himself.
for salutosindelicat, dammit Skree it turned frikking epic again
Date: 2020-03-10 04:38 pm (UTC)Except, it'd been for Aziraphale.
It isn't even that he likes doing nice things for Aziraphale. He doesn't. [1]Oh, the angel deserves nice things, Crowley won't deny that. All things great and small and cute and cuddly and beautiful and wonderful and okay, fine, so maybe, just maybe he's done Aziraphale a few kindnesses in their time. Maybe.
But for selfish reasons, ultimately. Because he is [2] addicted to the smile Aziraphale wears whenever Crowley does something nice for him. Crowley likes that smile. So it's purely selfish and not for the angel's benefit at all. Crowley is the one who benefits. He's justified it to himself like that for centuries--millennia now, really--and the logic is as sound as ever.
It's also now completely moot.
Several months ago, the world failed to end. Several weeks after that, Crowley and Aziraphale managed to actually get their act together (at the same speed, on their own side) and start something that might, just might, possibly, be considered a relationship. With kissing and everything.
And Crowley's never been happier, and judging by how often Aziraphale wears the smile Crowley used to go to great lengths to try and coax out of him, neither has Aziraphale.
So Crowley thought he'd do something...nice. The sort of thing humans in relationships do. A date. Dinner, flowers, an evening out.
Which is how he's ended up sitting at a performance of An Ideal Husband next to Aziraphale, watching actos and actresses exchange Oscar Wilde witticisms in the name of art and theatre.
It does not explain why he's got his arms folded over his chest and has been gradually looking more and more scowl-y as the play's gone on. Granted, one of the main themes is forgiveness for past mistakes, which is always going to be something as a sore point.
This was a bad idea and it's biting him and he's trying to hold his tongue and just enjoy the play, or at least enjoy Aziraphale enjoying the play, which was always going to be the real point of the evening for Crowley. But it's proving hard going.
And that's why Crowley shouldn't be caught doing nice things. Obviously. It only leads to trouble.
...fucking Oscar Wilde.
[1] As a professional fount of wickedness Crowley spends a lot of time lying, especially to himself.
[2] Also was, has been, and always will be